Manifesting & the Detachment Paradox Solved

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Correct me if I’m wrong, but from what I can tell the most frustrating aspect of manifesting is detachment.

You’re telling me that I’m supposed to want to manifest something, but then not care if I manifest it?

That seems like one big fat paradox and loads of crap to me.

This is how some people feel about manifesting. However, while pondering it last evening in relation to my upcoming meeting with a potential future purveyor of my orgonite pyramids,  some truths became very evident.

The reason it is so important to completely detach from the “what” of what the object of your manifesting might look like is this: In doing so you are closing yourself off to the potential of something better, and your neediness actually repels the object of your desire.

Is there any way to know what that something better may look like from your current vantage point? NO. So don’t even try.

Let’s break this down further and look at all the benefits of practicing detachment in manifesting.

  • Number 1: Detachment does not mean you don’t care. Care up a storm! But care about the end result, not the middle stuff. I will do my best and try my best and prepare for my upcoming meeting with this business owner to the best of my abilities. I care a ton about this meeting. But if it doesn’t pan out… well ok I will feel a little gutted probably, but I’ll also be able to pull myself back together and keep on keeping on.
  • Number 2: If your first attempt doesn’t pan out, then YAY! You’ve got everything prepared to do it again PLUS you’ve likely learned a few things about what not to do next time and you’re no longer green in the gills.Note: Doing Number 2 means that you have to re-frame what is seen by typical people as “failure”. There’s no such thing as failure, just many learning lessons of what not to do. I think some famous person said something similar to that sometime in the past.
  • Number 3: If you’ve embraced Number 1 and Number 2 you will act as calm as a cucumber when you go into “the situation” (I use quotation marks because “the situation” will differ but feel equally as immensely important for everyone). You will not give off that icky gicky “I need this or I will literally die” vibe. That’s not attractive. Nobody likes that. And energetically it’s like manifesting repellent.

I know, I know, I’ve made it sound intellectually very easy to embrace detachment and I fully acknowledge that living and doing it is a whole ‘nother thing. BUT…

If you do start to embrace detachment while manifesting then little by little it will get easier.

Just like getting back to running after 2 months off was painful and my pathetic muscle strength and cardio was embarrassing to myself. But after 3 weeks, oh the glorious 3 week mark! The endorphins were flowing once again and my muscles and cardio were no longer pathetic.

I’m not saying that after 3 weeks of practicing detachment in manifesting you will be a master and love every minute of it. I am saying that you will get more in the flow, neuropathways will begin to form that will begin to make things easier.

Allow that dangling carrot to motivate you. As well as the carrot of manifesting ultimately being more successful and rewarding.

And remember – no matter what happens, either way you will be ok. Take a deep breath and repeat that to yourself several times.

Perhaps you have already tried detachment in manifesting. Any interesting results to share? Comment below!

Love and Light,

Twyla K

Twyla K is the owner of Soul Shine Healing & Coaching. She offers Clarity Sessions to help people who are tired of feeling stuck uncover what they truly want, what’s blocking them, and what they can do about it. Click Here to apply for a Clarity Session today!

Soul Aligned vs “Shoulding” in Manifesting

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The #1 most important and foundational piece to manifesting is your intention.

You can take all the classes on manifesting you want and apply technique after technique, but if your intention is off – then it’s all for naught.

A fire won’t start without a spark, and in the same way – your manifesting won’t take off unless you have that spark of desire and passion.

It’s really funny / sad how in the manifesting workshops and 1:1 sessions I do, I see people shooting themselves in the foot before they even get out of the gate.

Then when they leave the gate they’re hobbling and forcing it and not enjoying any of the process, obviously, because it’s painful to run with a hole in your foot.

Why do they do this? Because their intention is more of a “should” than something that is truly Soul aligned and lights them up.

So they say they want it, and often they believe it’s something they should want, but if we dig a little deeper – WHICH I LOVE DOING! Then it becomes clear that there is zip zero nada passion behind it.

And this goes for me too! There are goals I’ve set for myself that either went nowhere or when I reached them I was like – yayyyy…. fizzle fizzle fizzle…. Because I didn’t actually care about them and they didn’t create abundance for me.

The two foundational questions to ask yourself every time you set a big intention are:

  1. Is this aligned to who I truly am at Soul level?
  2. Does this light me up, get me excited, and feel expansive?

The key is you need to get a YES to both questions.

I may get all jazzed up about something and get a big yes to Question 2. For example, I was really fired up about writing a book last year and set that as my intention.

But then when I went to Question 1 this year and checked if it’s aligned to me at Soul level…. I got a big NO.

Now, I could write a guidebook because at Soul level I am good at training, so there’s a little loophole I can wiggle into there if I want.

Regardless, the main point is that I did not get a YES to both questions and therefore if I went ahead and wrote a traditional book it would not bring me abundance.

And to be fair, writing a book isn’t a manifesting intention. It’s a to do. It can be a normal intention for sure, but since we’re talking about manifesting I need to clarify that it’s not something to manifest.

Manifesting relates to attracting things you have no control over into your experience, i.e., money, people and opportunities.

But you still want to ask yourself those 2 questions for regular intention setting too. Because they will help you weed out intentions that won’t bring you abundance.

If you want to answer Question 1 but you don’t know who you are at Soul level, then it may be time to get a Soul Profile reading with me. It’s a big deal to understand and connect to your Soul Gift and Divine Nature!

In conclusion – if there’s something you set as an intention to manifest and it’s just not happening – ask yourself the two questions above. Then if needed, revise your intention till it does get you a big YES to both questions.

Love and light,

Twyla K

Twyla K is the owner of Soul Shine Healing & Coaching. She offers Clarity Sessions to help people who are tired of feeling stuck uncover what they truly want, what’s blocking them, and what they can do about it. Click Here to apply for a Clarity Session today!

Why Cognitive Dissonance is Effing Up Your Manifesting

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Imagine for a moment that you’re driving and you pull up to an intersection where the traffic light is both red and green at the same time.

What do you do?

Green indicates go, but… There’s also the red which clearly means stop…

Likely you will sit at this intersection for a while in a very confused state. You will sit there doing nothing until you get a clear signal on what to do.

NEWSFLASH! The Universe, your Higher Self, and your Spirit Guides are no different from you. If they’re getting mixed signals on what you want from you, then you can bet they’re going to be able to do a whole lot of nothing with that too.

So if you ever find yourself wondering, “Why isn’t this happening for me?” Check yourself – Are you sending out mixed messages?

Getting out of cognitive dissonance requires a deep level of honesty with yourself, because it typically happens when you’re “shoulding” yourself into wanting something and/or you have two very opposing feelings about something.

In both cases there will be one way that is true for you and one that is not. And it’s up to you to figure out which is which so you can get moving again.

When faced with this task it’s helpful to ask yourself the following the questions:

  1. If I’m honest with myself, what do I really want and why?
  2. When I think about wanting to do Option A – can I identify any external influences at play? Is this someone else’s idea or plan that I’m just going along with?
  3. Which of the two options would truly serve me and my highest good?
  4. Is either option something I just feel I should do and am not actually passionate about?

Another helpful activity is to close your eyes, put your hands over your heart, and then bring each option into your thoughts. Observe at a feeling level if there’s an expansion in your heart area or a contraction.

Expansion indicates the option is aligned to you and good for you, and contraction indicates it’s not.

Journalling can also help : )

The point is to get past all the noise, down to your core, down to what truly resonates for you, and then own that.

Once you get your answer, you need to stick to it. The wishy washy-ness was what got you stuck in the first place – so do not go back there!

This requires resolve and stick-to-it-ive-ness. Because there’s a good chance you will be tempted to waffle again. If you find yourself contemplating waffling, simply say to yourself – “I eat waffles for breakfast.” Then revisit the reasons you feel one option is best again to really cement in your resolve.

Your ego may tempt you by putting whipped cream on the waffles in the form of “what if” scenarios and even a gut wrenching dread that you’ve made the “wrong” decision and will regret it.

Recognizing this as an ego trick is the first step. Second step is knowing that there is no right and wrong, only your best made choice in this moment.

As you work more with this and start to see happy results and life progress, you’ll be able to give your ego’s tricks less and less attention.

And of course the glorious result of all this – the making up your mind in one clear direction and setting one clear intention – is that the Universe, your Higher Self and your Spirit Guides will be able to help you out now!

Manifestation = back on track.

But it all starts with you. Make no mistake. You choose red or you choose green – you can’t have it both ways : )

In love, light and truth,

Twyla K

Twyla K is the owner of Soul Shine Healing & Coaching. She offers Clarity Sessions to help people who are tired of feeling stuck uncover their blocks, what they truly want, and get their soul sparkle for life back. Click Here to apply for a Clarity Session today!